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Tuesday, October 23, 2007

The Importance of Mentors

j.Po's fingers of (on) fire.

“Mentor: Someone whose hindsight can become your foresight.” - unattributed

I can't speak enough of the great group of people in my life whom I call mentors. There's a separation between people who are simply inspiring to be around, those who are teachers, and those who are actually mentors...mentoring is all about the Verb, and it's a conscious choice on their part. Mentors usually focus on one area in your life, so it's different than just being raised "right" or your upbringing. You can have a mentor when you're 22 or 92, as far as I'm concerned.

According to Wikipedia, famous Mentor/Mentee relationships include:

* Socrates and Plato
* Plato and Aristotle
* Aristotle and Alexander the Great
* Ezra Pound and T. S. Eliot

That's not bad company, really. I can honestly say I've never approached someone and said, "Hello. Be my mentor." It's more of a stumbling, the way I do things. You have to make sure you're going in the same direction and all that, because it's a big undertaking...usually that doesn't happen until you're working with your mentor-to-be in some other capacity. Maybe they start out as a teacher or a boss, but I've never met anyone with "Mentor" on their business card. :)

It's a weird balance, too. There has to be a spark, I think. Then you have to be in a comfortable enough zone with this mentor (i.e. know them pretty well) so they can be brutally honest with you, and when they tell you positive things, you have to be able to believe them. I hate haaaaaate brutal honesty when it involves being told you have to change something or work on something (who doesn't?)...but if your mentor is coming from the right place it's essential to listen.

My Life Guru and caretaker of general life quiddities happens to be my ex-boss, Karen. She fired me, sorta. She chose to give me no option of re-employment after I graduated from college so I'd go...I dunno, see things. And move to Austin. She was entirely correct.

Once she also told me if I did not finish a research paper with an open-ended due date by "next Thursday," I wouldn't have to bother coming back to work until I did. I liked going to work. I finished the paper.

I still check in just about every time I skate through Albuquerque. I've got an appointment for a chat over oatmeal in a couple weeks, in fact. Very excited.

I guess my point is...if there's something you want to work on in life, and I don't care if it's music or writing or cooking or fixing your car yourself (not a bad idea, hm)...going at it alone is a rough time, and it doesn't have to be that way. Seek out opportunities, keep your eyes open, and stumble a little bit. Those wise and perceptive mentor-types will be looking out for you when you need it.

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